The River
by Draven NightHawk
Summary: "Even if you can't see me, I'll still be able to see you..." - Ichigo spots a boy drowning in the river, and things go from bad to worse. Ichigo may not be aware of it, but Rukia does indeed still look out for him. One-shot.


_Hello all! This story takes place after Ichigo has lost his shinigami powers, and before meeting the Fullbringers. I wanted to write an event in Ichigo's life that brings some of his issues at that time to the foreground, as well as entertain the idea that although Ichigo may not have been aware of it, Rukia did indeed still look out for him. _

_Enjoy!  
>~ Draven<em>

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><p>The soft, steady beats of rain as they fell on an umbrella suspended above a head of bright orange were suddenly drowned out as a disgruntled cry was emitted from under its shelter. Ichigo stopped to lift the foot that had been caught ankle deep in a puddle, shaking the water from it. He gave a heavy sigh as he steadied himself back on two feet, taking the moment to stand and take in his surroundings. He had been lost in thought, allowing his feet to subconsciously lead him back to his home on this dreary day. Ichigo gazed at the swelling waters of the river below the path he was on, noting how the river's water level against the retaining wall was very similar to the day his mother…<p>

"_No…"_ Ichigo shook his head slightly to clear it. _"It's been hard enough these past several months. No need to make my thoughts any darker."_

The last several months translated to an exact ten months. Ten long and monotonous months. Rukia hadn't come to Karakura town even once since he had lost his powers. He hadn't been too surprised when she didn't reappear during the past winter, as he figured Soul Society would take some time to recover itself after the harrowing Winter War. But then springtime came and went. Now autumn was just around the corner.

"_Even if you can't see me, I'll still be able to see you…"_

Rukia's words from their last moments together echoed in his mind. He remembered how she had stood before him, arms crossed, a playful smirk on her face as she spoke those words. If he hadn't known her any better, he'd say she had looked unaffected by the way things would be. But he knew her well enough to recognize when she was being strong for him.

Ichigo squeezed his eyes shut at the memory, trying to block it, but he had allowed the dam he had built up in his mind to leak, and now it was flooding him with images of Rukia as she began to alarmingly vanish in front of him. He clenched his jaw as he vividly saw her eyes look upwards to meet his own as she slowly faded, and how her eyes had reflected the pain he had felt. The knowledge that their imminent separation affected her as deeply as it did him was a difficult feeling to be left with.

"_So why has she not come?"_ Ichigo ran a hand through his hair in frustration, then exhaled and let the hand fall limply to his side as he resumed walking. _"I guess it'd be awkward anyway. Last thing I need is for anyone to visit because they feel sorry for me."_

A faint splash from downriver caused Ichigo to pause his steps and look around, immediately alert.

"Help! Somebody!"

Ichigo felt his insides clench with horror as he scanned the area for the source of the voice, and spotted a small hand in the middle of the river as it dropped out of sight.

"Hang on!" Ichigo yelled as he tore down the embankment, throwing his umbrella away. He saw a young boy's head break the surface of the water, his eyes terrified, before being forced down again by the strong current.

"I'm coming!" Ichigo shouted as he ran to the edge of the river, then dove in.

The cold water shocked his body. Ichigo surfaced, sputtering, then swam diagonally, letting the current help him to reach the area he'd last seen the boy. The boy suddenly appeared again some yards from him. He looked younger than his twin sisters by a few good years.

"Almost there!" Ichigo gasped out as he continued to swim towards him.

The boy saw him and frantically tried to fight the current to get to him. "Help! I can't-" The boy sank once more.

Ichigo drew in his breath and ducked underwater. He tried to search for the boy, but the water was too muddy to see anything. Abruptly, the current bumped him into something soft. He swung his arm around the object and swam for the surface, sucking in the welcome air as his head cleared the water. To his great relief, he found himself holding the boy, who seemed to be struggling to stay conscious as he coughed out some water.

"It's ok, I've got you now!" Ichigo yelled encouragingly over the din of the swirling water as he fought to keep them afloat.

"Thanks…oniisan…" the boy weakly managed to say between painful coughs.

Ichigo looked to the shore to judge how far they were from it, and saw a man waving and incoherently shouting at him from it. Continuing to allow the current to help him along, Ichigo swam diagonally downstream towards the riverbank, dodging dangerous pieces of debris that were sweeping by them. As Ichigo neared the river's edge, the man who he'd seen upstream came rushing to meet them.

"Yuki! Thank goodness! Here! Bring him here!" The man shouted as he crouched in the rain-soaked grass near the edge of the river's retaining wall.

"Otou-san!"

Exhausted and wheezing, Ichigo reached the river's wall and held onto the stone ledge at the edge of the embankment with one hand while heaving the boy towards the man's outstretched hands. The boy was passed to safety, and Ichigo added his other hand to the edge as he tried to hoist himself from the water's strong pull.

"Hold on, let me help you!" The man offered as he turned from laying the boy on the grass.

Ichigo reached to take the man's extended hand when he sensed something coming towards him from the corner of his eye. Ichigo spun his head to look, but was too late. A large tree limb rammed into him, knocking him back into the rapid current. He heard the man shout in panic at him before being swept underwater.

Ichigo's eyes popped open as he looked frantically around for the surface. The knock from the tree limb had spun him around, and the murky water made it difficult to tell up from down. His lungs burning, Ichigo struggled to swim towards his best guess for the top.

Just as he found himself wondering if he should have been swimming in the opposite direction, his head broke above the water. Ichigo gasped for breath for a few seconds before he was unwillingly pulled back under for a brief moment.

As he came back up, he noticed that the river had gone around a bend, and he could no longer see the man or boy. He also became acutely aware of how tired his body was; a stitch in his side was already making treading the water difficult. If he didn't get to shore soon, he would drown from fatigue.

"_Just concentrate on the shore…"_ Ichigo told himself as he began to swim towards it. However, his strokes and kicks were not as strong as they had been, and the current kept frustrating any progress he tried to make.

Having gained only a few yards, Ichigo's thoughts began to drift, becoming less aware of what was happening to his cold and strained body. _"…I survive a monster like Aizen, and then meet my end by drowning instead…I can see it now when I arrive in Soul Society…people will joke about the war hero who died by inhaling too much water…"_

Ichigo moved a bit closer to the shore without being aware of it. _"…at least…at least I'd be a shinigami again…and see old friends…could still visit my family too…"_ Ichigo suddenly found himself underwater again, and gave several raspy coughs as he managed to bob back above. _"No! What am I thinking! Karin…Yuzu…they would be heartbroken…Okaasan's death was hard enough on the family, and I've…" _Ichigo's eyes narrowed and his strokes became a bit stronger at a sudden thought. _"…I've got to live, no matter how hard things get, because my Okaasan gave her life to save mine!"_

Belting out a war cry, Ichigo doubled his efforts to reach the shore. He began to close the distance between himself and the bank in a last burst of energy. He wasn't even paying attention to how far he had to go; Ichigo's thoughts were bent solely on making one stroke after another.

His hand scraped something hard.

Ichigo looked up to see the wall before him, and his hand instantly rose to seize the ledge as the water swept him parallel to it. With some effort, his other hand came to rest beside his first.

The ledge was only two feet above the water's level, but it might as well have been twenty as Ichigo found himself struggling to hoist himself up and over. Ichigo grunted with the effort as the icy water rushed around his neck, his arms stretched to their fullest above his head and his fingers growing cramped as he tried to both fight the current and pull his weight out of the water. Ichigo's whole body felt drained; he'd burned the last of his adrenaline getting to the wall, and he could feel himself succumbing to blacking out.

"Well…this is good…" Ichigo gasped out, his teeth chattering. He tried once more to pull himself up, but the change in his grip allowed the water to drag his body sideways, almost causing him to completely lose his grasp on the ledge. Ichigo panted as he sank back down into the water, his numb hands still stiffly clutching the wall.

As he hung helplessly suspended from the ledge, Ichigo's mind began to fog, and he slowly found himself standing in a field of tall grass at night, a full moon shining brightly. He gazed at the moon for a long time, then abruptly had the impression that he needed to look behind him. Turning around, he saw a person that he had begun to lose hope of ever seeing again.

"…_Rukia!" _Ichigo opened his mouth to speak, but fumbled helplessly as his brain tried to process what he was seeing.

She walked quietly up to him, the moon illuminating her face as they faced one another. She looked at him calmly, waiting for him to speak. "Help…" Ichigo croaked out in a whisper. "I have to live. But I'm not strong enough to do this alone..."

A small smile grew on Rukia's face as she regarded him. "You're not alone, fool."

Ichigo returned the smile as a peacefulness came over him. The feeling remained as Rukia and the field gradually faded, replaced by darkness.

"Ichigo…Ichigo!"

A voice was faintly calling him. Ichigo heard himself groan as he became aware of firm ground beneath his back. He felt a light pressure on his shoulder, then something he couldn't distinguish between being either fingers or a small breeze brushing back the bangs from his forehead. His breaths began to come more easily.

A slight weight was placed on his soaked shirt near his heart. His heart thudded against the weight, assuring them that it was still steadily beating.

Seemingly satisfied, the warm pressure on his chest ceased.

"You just can't stay out of trouble, can you, Ichigo..."

The sound of the words seemed to come from so far away that Ichigo wondered if he was imagining them. But he could hear the amusement in the voice. _"Rukia's voice..!"_ His eyes sprung open with the realization.

"Rukia!" Ichigo sat up with a start, eyes wide as he wildly looked around for her. But his eyes saw no one.

Sighing, Ichigo's face became downcast with disappointment as he got unsteadily to his feet, noticing as he did that the rain had let off.

Looking at the clearing sky, Ichigo's face became contemplative. With a sudden thought, Ichigo cupped his hands to the sides of his mouth and called out. "Rukia! Even though I can't see you, I know you're still with me." He paused, lowering his hands as he gave a soft smile. "Thank you."

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><p>Unseen, Rukia stood at a distance facing Ichigo, an opened senkaimon behind her. She smiled as she turned to follow the black butterfly back home.<p>

"Till next we meet, Ichigo."

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><p><em><strong>Author's Notes:<strong> I love getting to interact with you guys, so send me your comments! Also, get on my author's alert, and you'll know when I've come out with a new story. :)  
><em>

_Onii-san - Used to refer to an older male sibling, or addressing a boy/young man who is your elder (the latter was used in this story)_

_Otousan - Father_

_Okaasan - Mother_


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